Out of the black

I’ve been debating on whether to get a blog for a few years now, and obviously chose not to until, well, today. My reasons for abstaining from jumping onto this particular bandwagon were many. The fact that it IS a  bandwagon certainly deterred me. I’m not great at being part of the pack, or at least I like to tell myself that. I also didn’t (and still don’t, really) think I have anything interesting to share with the online world of bloggers and blog followers. I’m interested in politics, but not passionately so anymore. I’m a military wife and mother, and while this may set me apart from a good majority of the bloggers out there, there are still bloggers aplenty living the same lifestyle I am. I have suffered some hardships, and perhaps blogging during those times would have been a great outlet, but for the most part I feel I’ve come out on the other end. I’ve come out of my black.

I’m also horrendous at keeping up with journals. I probably have about 10 of them laying around the house with no more than 10 entries each. I get confused when I journal. Who am I supposed to be talking to? Myself? I have a toddler, Lord knows I do enough of that on a daily basis. Am I supposed to write back stories? Give the history of my life to remind myself or (and I flatter myself here) future generations to come, why I’m feeling the way I am? If I have a hard time writing my thoughts and feelings down for myself, how much harder will it be for an audience?

These are questions that I haven’t answered, yet still I’ve created a blog. After about 10 seconds of contemplation I’ve come to the following conclusion. I want to blog because I don’t want to forget. (Even the word “blog”, over and over again, eeks me out.) I’ve watched my miracle baby slip from an impossible dream, to a tiny, living, breathing human, now to a rambunctious toddler in the space of a breath. I panic when I think of how quickly the time is slipping by, and I wish to preserve these, the best years of my life, for myself if no one else.

I’m not going to pretend to write anything coherent, or do anything in an orderly fashion. In fact, I don’t think I’ll even tell anyone I’ve created this little thing until I’ve got several posts under my belt and can prove to myself that this might have some staying power. I won’t be making any political statements. I won’t pretend to teach you the infallible ways of my superior parenting. I won’t try and make you understand what it is to live life as a Military wife (though that might invariably happen along the way.) This will simply be the random musings of a woman who loves life and the people in it. The music that moves me, the photos that inspire me, the family that gives me a purpose in life, and the banalities of a woman who is always on a quest for self. I hope you also enjoy finding her along the way.